This post is going to be super short since I am hosting Thanksgiving and I have three pies to make today completely from scratch as well as cranberry sauce and chicken stock for the matzo ball soup that Ryan requested for Thanksgiving even though that is not a Thanksgiving thing.
Matzo ball soup was actually his second request after I shot down "whatever tacos you think would go well with Thanksgiving."
So yesterday Ryan and I were lounging around watching last week's episode of Parks and Rec. At the end of the episode one of the characters makes the remark "Life is short, why be an accountant?" So Ryan of course started making fun of me for being an accountant.
Ryan: Haha that's like you. Lame.
Me: You should teach a class on clever insults. And anyway I am not an accountant any more, I am a sort of writer and a soon-to-be mother.
Ryan: Wait what?
Me: Relax. I'm not pregnant...yet. Although if you don't come around pretty soon I'm going to start circulating petitions. How many signatures would I need for you to consider a baby?
Ryan: I don't know 5,000?
Me: Interesting. How many signatures would I need for you to dress up as Santa Claus and walk around Chicago with me this December?
Ryan: Maybe 10,000?
Me: That seems backwards. And yet I'm intrigued. Challenge accepted!
Ryan: I'm not even worried. You are for sure going to fail.
So here's the thing Blogstalkers. I convinced Ryan that FB likes are the same thing as signatures. If I get 10,000 then he will dress up as Santa Claus and I will dress up as Mrs. Claus and we will walk around Chicago passing out candy canes.
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| And my decolletage will be less stunning than this because of the children. And that is the only reason. (CREDIT HERE) |
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| And they will LOVE it. (CREDIT HERE) |
If only I had a small child to dress like an elf...sigh...
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| (CREDIT HERE) |
UPDATE:
UPDATE #2:
So I've got to try to get this to work. 10,000 likes is...well...it's probably unattainable. But how wonderful would it be if it all worked out? I would take so many videos and pictures too for you all to see. So I'm going to update my Facebook status now. So friend me on Facebook and share my status and help me out? If for no other reason do it to see OJ in man tights.
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| (CREDIT HERE) |
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| Believe me OJ, I know. |
Firstly: Where do I sign?
ReplyDeleteSecondly: It'll work. We just need to get The Bloggess and a few others on board to spread the message among their followers too.
Woohoo! I am so in, can't wait to see this. Can you dress up one of the dogs as a xmas octopus just for fun?
ReplyDeleteThis can totally happen!
ReplyDeleteLauren, this is the greatest thing I have ever seen. I will pimp it to my fullest ability!
ReplyDeleteOJ will be the hottest elf to ever wear jingly pointy shoes and I love how Vanessa agreed so easily! You seriously have the greatest friends. Ryan, get ready to get your Claus on!!
I have a question.
ReplyDeleteWhat on earth are you trying the whole awesome Chrimblemas shenanigans thing when for half the likes you could have a baby instead?
It does sound good though, almost makes me wish that I lived in Chicago even though the cold would probably kill me...
You already have 138 likes! You totally got this. I love it.
ReplyDeleteI wrote a whole comment and clicked publish but it directed me to google. I forgot to change the "comment as" thing.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, what I said was that I'm not on FB but if I was I would definitely "like" your status. But also, if you get 10,000 likes then you've covered the Christmas-y dress up party as well as the 'Let's have a baby factor', no?
True Jenn, He did not say it had to be 5000 and 10000 SEPARATE likes!
ReplyDeleteHAHAH!! I love it! I also love how into it your friends are. Good friends, there, Lauren! My friends wouldn't be caught dead in an Elf costume - you know how to pick 'em!
ReplyDeleteI'm on board!
ReplyDeleteDo comments on the blog count? Or is it exclusive to Facebook thumbs up?
ReplyDeleteWill so be passing this on. We want photos.
ReplyDeleteTell me where to like or vote or sign!
ReplyDeleteJust my status on FB!
DeleteI liked and shared and told others to like it as well, so hopefully it will help in a real way towards your goal. Also, Brian told me that if you get 10,000 likes and walk around downtown Chicago dressed up, he would fly up there with me, and get us a fancy hotel room, so we can have a winter vacation and I will be able to see the costume parade of you all :) He made me show him this post first to make sure I wasn't lying (I may or may not be known for doing anything in order to get a vacation to Chicago), but then he saw it and pinkie sweared he would take me! So keep us all updated! I have a lot riding on this...no pressure or anyhing :)
ReplyDeleteLauren, two things:
ReplyDelete1. I will most definitely "whore" your Facebook out.
2. If you need any additional elves/reindeer/etc I would totally volunteer myself to your cause! You just let me know.
OJ is only a perfect Elf if he doesn't have to carry a sign ... apparently! ;) And I totally echo the "5000 likes for Santa costumes still counts as total amount needed to procreate RYAN!"
ReplyDeleteI had to whip out a dictionary for decolletage. (And by dictionary, I mean merriam-webster.com, obviously.) So your blog is therefore both entertaining and educational. And you must have some crazy huge vocabulary.
ReplyDeleteLater at home I will enter facebook and join the cause, I think you can do it!!
ReplyDeleteOMG YES! I think Ryan says the baby thing because you'd still have to do the thing to make the baby and then 9 months, whereas Christmas is NOW. He is protecting himself from imminent (probably spelled wrong) danger. Smart man, but I will work hard to ensure it doesn't succeed! This should count as my signature...
ReplyDeletePosted on reddit - http://redd.it/13lgz3
ReplyDelete5 hours in and I'm the 581st liker! If The Bloggess and George Takei get in on it, Ryan will not know what hit him. Except that he's going to be his very own Santa Claus Parade.
ReplyDeleteOh I am ALLL over this. Sending my friend request now.
ReplyDeleteIf the "baby" and the "dressing up like santa" likes aren't counted separately, then by my math (and I am accountant so it must be for true) then if you make it to 10,000 you also get TWO BABIES!
ReplyDeleteSeriously? I just read a CNN article that some kids got a cat because their dad said they could if they got 5,000 likes on FB. They got 10,000 pr more.... I'm gonna go stalk you on Facebook. (p.s. my dad runs a Santa visit business (long story) and in high school I dressed as an elf to drive for him. We used to drive through store parking lots and hand out candy canes. It would freak out adults (especially men, like Ryan) who were harassing or making fun of the ladies they were with when Santa shakes a finger and threatens to give him coal if he's not nice to her.
ReplyDeleteThis must happen!! Chicago would be so much better because of it.
ReplyDeleteI just liked your status. Actually, I could do it without friending you, I guess because of how you have your security settings arranged.
ReplyDeleteI think blog comments should also count as signatures!
ReplyDeleteIs there a deadline?
ReplyDeleteWhile this is my first visit to your blog, I feel an urgent need to jump onboard this project.
ReplyDeleteTotally random, and absolutely unrelated, but I saw this while searching for stocking stuffer ideas...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.thinkgeek.com/product/ec3d/
Inflatable tentacle arms!!!
I am thinking to ask the blogess for help. Her army seems to totally get stuff done. Just a thought. off to LIKE
ReplyDeleteHeather
I'm not on FB either, but I'm liking you via this comment!
ReplyDeleteLauren, I stand behind Melissa's costume idea!!! AND by the by my little girl would make the cutest elf if you needed to borrow her...as long as I get to dress up. We just need to hop on a plane from FL..
ReplyDeleteYou make my day!
were do we "like?" I don't see a button. I did though post a link box on my personal page.
ReplyDeleteFound it! all shared. Sharing is caring. only 8000+ to go.
ReplyDeleteLike+++++++
ReplyDeleteWow. I just liked before I even saw that you made the numbers cut! Awesome.
ReplyDelete