Today I would like to recount for you a conversation my husband and I had the other day while walking the dogs. We were discussing why a couple of our acquaintances won't just like, start dating already.
Lauren: Oh she's just playing hard to get.
Ryan: I don't understand that tactic at all. That would never work with me.
Lauren: What are you even talking about right now, how do you think we started dating?
Ryan: I took you for ice cream once and then I couldn't get rid of you.
Lauren: Ok RUDE. And no, I totally played hard to get. I booby trapped you into falling in love with me.
Ryan: First of all, 18 year old you was like flat. So more like no-boobies-trapped.
Lauren: Oh how clever RYAN. I wish I had said that.
Ryan: You know it's true.
Lauren: I was a late bloomer you jerk. I just used to tell myself that having an A+ cup size was fine as it was in keeping with my pristine GPA.
Ryan: Haha yeah and then sophomore year of college and boom, C cup, still in keeping with your GPA. (sidenote: this is not true.)
Lauren: You are just full of nice things to say about me today aren't you? I don't even know why we are talking about what size bra I wore in high school anyway, it's not like you ever got to see it.
Ryan: Did you just say that so when you put this conversation on your blog everyone will think that you were a very sweet little innocent senior in high school?
Lauren: Maybe. (I was mostly) But anyway, back to the point of this conversation. You fell in love with me because I played hard to get, unintentionally, I'll grant you that, but I did do it.
Ryan: Give me one example.
Lauren: Ok, how about that one Friday night, before we were officially dating, when you wanted me to come over and watch How Harry Met Sally with you and instead, probably because I was weirded out by your unnatural obsession with Meg Ryan, I chose to go disco roller-skating with my friends. And you couldn't come with because you had just rolled your ankle playing volleyball.
Ryan: Let's get one thing straight, I would not ever have gone disco roller-skating with you, no matter what the condition of my ankle.
Lauren: Marissa and I wore bell-bottoms to get in character.
Ryan: Of course you did.
Lauren: Don't you remember though? You called my house the next morning and were all sad and like "You could have at least called to say hi last night." OH and what about the day like a week after that when you asked me if I wanted to eat lunch at your table? I totally said no. Which I will tell you now was because my lunch table used to have potluck lunches on Fridays and someone had brought a huge bag of Cheetos. Otherwise I would have eaten with you. But you definitely just thought I didn't want to.
Lauren: You should concede. I have a lot more examples.
Ryan: Fine you won this one. You also won...
Lauren: If you say acceptance into the itty-bitty-tittie-committee I will find a stick and hit you with it.
Ryan: OH MY GOD Lauren. I was going to be sweet and say you also won my heart.
Lauren: Ok Puke Ryan. Let's go home.
So that was our, granted pretty inappropriate, Sunday-afternoon-while-walking-the-dogs conversation.
|He is not naked in this picture. He is wearing his bathing suit and no shirt, obviously.|
Sadly, the "flat" thing is totally true. When my sister and I were in fights she used to tell me I was "jealous of a wall." So yeah. I grew boobs and four inches as a 19 year old.
How has your week been so far Blogstalker? Anything interesting happen? Encounter any dead birds?