Fear not my loyal Blogstalkers, those of you left anyway, I am BACK.
I would have written sooner but for one week I was off enjoying the beautiful Hawaiian sun and watching one of my very best friends get married.
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| Such A Pretty Bride. Update: And yes OF COURSE the groom is nice-looking as well. |
And then for one week I was sitting in an aloe-filled bathtub yelling at Ryan to “bring more tylenol, and popsicles, and Archie comic books and aloe, MORE ALOE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.”
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| "Ryan do I look red, should I put on more sunscreen?" "No you look fine." Thanks RYAN. This is ALL YOUR FAULT. |
And then for one week I was busy peeling off concerningly large pieces of my skin and calling my doctor to ask if “2.5 inches long by about, I don’t know, maybe 1.6 inches wide, maybe a little bit more” was too much skin to be losing at once. (In case you’re wondering…“No a bit of peeling does not warrant an ER visit Mrs. Gallagher.”)
But anyway, I am back now and full to the brim of good old-fashioned stories about Ryan being a dumdum.
Those stories will have to wait for a bit though because Ryan bought me a lovely pearl ring in Hawaii in exchange for me maybe not writing about him on the blog for a little while and I am feeling pretty generous toward him at the moment. Although, he is starting to get pretty self-congratulatory, so we’ll see just how long I can play nice.
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| What a TERRIBLE place to get married. |
In the meantime, here is story of me being slightly less than awesome.
So the Board of Directors of my company was meeting in the
Chicago office yesterday.
It was a pretty big deal.
Everyone cleaned up their desks and actually wore a little bit of makeup (chapstick and deodorant is makeup right?) and practiced saying things like “It’s perfectly
lovely to meet you Mr. President.” Everything was going just swimmingly until I managed to bungle up the whole day by accidentally meowing at one of the big wigs.
Yep. That happened.
I was minding my own business, humming a catchy Justin Bieber number and ambling down the hallway. Then it happened. He came around the corner and I came around the corner from the opposite way at the same time and we almost collided and instead of being a normal person and just being all “Oh so sorry, excuse me. It is perfectly lovely to have you in the office today Mr. President,” I threw my hands up in front of my face (in what can only be described as a claws-out catlike fashion) and said “mrrewwahheoo.” And then he just stopped, looked at me all wide-eyed, turned, and backed slowly away.
And then I died a little of humiliation.
And then I decided that I am going to be a black cat for Halloween this year, no matter how cliché it is, because seriously, I had NO IDEA I was that good at meowing. And black is slimming.
P.S. This weekend at our end of the season softball party I won the girls’ MVP award. Ryan did not win the boys’ MVP award. No one was surprised.
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| Go Team! |
Sorry Ryan, looks like pearls don’t get you much more than five paragraphs of nice-Lauren. Maybe next time try diamonds? Ooooooh or babies.